Unfortunately, Flattery Will Get You Everywhere
We all like to hear good things said about ourselves. We like the confidence boost, we like to know that others consider us to be something.
Flattery sounds like that, but it isn’t. Flattery is a tool of the trade for someone that wants something out of you. Rather than seeking to boost you up and show love, flattery is saying things that they think you will like, in the hopes of getting something out of you.
And it often works very well.
In Proverbs 7, flattery is just one of the tools that the seductress uses in her attempts to convince the man to commit adultery with her.
She seduces him with her persistent pleading;
Proverbs 7:21
she lures with her flattering talk.
We know that the Proverbs were written for Solomon’s son, who would be king, and so we’re hearing these things from this perspective– so we shouldn’t assume that men are not flatterers, etc. In fact, both sexes engage in flattery all the time– and it’s tempting for us to use it as well. How so?
We use it when we’re getting to know someone, when we’re first dating, and when we want to get along with our boss. We’re tempted to use it to ease over situations that are difficult to make them better– if I can just get the person to think well of themselves and think that I have a high value of them, maybe this difficult conversation will go over better.
Flattery is never something that we should be using– for we should be honest and transparent. It is far better to hear what someone actually thinks than what they are saying when they just want you to feel better. This is where actions often speak louder than words, and where contradictions can come into play when someone says that they like something to one person and not to another.
Honesty, not flattery, is the best policy.
